The Real Deal in Romantic Relationships

If we take the perspective that everything in life happens to help us become more aware and evolve then we can also see that play out in romantic relationships. When a person becomes involved with another on an intimate level with the intention of being romantic, then the healing and awareness speeds up spiritually. What then is the purpose of the “other” in a romantic relationship one might wonder?


You guessed it! Ok, maybe not. Here is the real deal. From my point of view, the “Romantic Partner” is the symbolic spiritual teacher. Now whether a person consciously takes on that role or not, it depends. Sometimes it is one partner who is more open and aware while the other one is coasting along not knowing. Or one or both partners playing hide and seek or being evasive with their issues and in the end it creates more stress for themselves and everyone in their life. Surely you have  seen or experienced plenty of issues repeatedly show up, and did I mention repeatedly? On top of that selecting same type of partner after partner or partners with similar thread or issues that you are hiding or in denial about? With me so far?

Sometimes this repeat happen unconsciously, at other times one is aware of the choice and still gravitates towards something or someone who is toxic. Until sheer agony and cynicism sets in and one’s distorted perspective rules the selection of picking same “type” of partners who will be a reflection or reflect the core issue(s).

The repeated, extra repeated and life long repeat of same or similar patterns or experience(s) are trying to get your attention to heal, mature or evolve through various partner. Once you pay attention, or rather heed the call a.k.a message and work with it (even stop resisting it) it starts to shift. Things open up to new possibilities. And it is no longer on repeat loop, but rather now evolves to the next stage or level.

Through interacting and being with a romantic partner, there is an opportunity or two to become aware of things that you were unconscious or unaware of. Where you may be choosing or expressing through your addiction or pain remaining a victim. Or perhaps the partner is reflecting this energy pattern to or at you. You may even see where you are engaging in distorted or dysfunctional behaviors. Anything pushed away or rejected will arise from the murky graves of the unconscious so you can be more empowered and conscious. On the flip side, you get to see where you have grown or healed and accessed new talents or skills. It is an ongoing process, layer after layer, stage upon stage.

There is a golden opportunity from a spiritual level, to recognize that when two people meet there is a Sacred Contract as much as it is a chance to practice daily; unconditional love, awareness, trust, empowerment and evolving. There are many subtle nuances to this, yet the basics are “How can you love another at the Soul level, full of love (without conditions), compassion while remaining empowered yet empowering the other person?

If two people decide to evolve together consciously, it is a Soul to Soul Romantic Relationship. And the Spiritual evolution for both speeds up dramatically for they then grow to be in service to a higher purpose while expressing love. If one or both are in ignorance or resistance, then the Romantic Relationship becomes much more difficult and full of needless suffering. Well you know the story…. it’s bleak, depressing and full of addictive behaviors that wound one another.

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